Capture Your Grief 2017 Day 6: Bella Luna


#Captureyourgrief 2017 Day 6: Bella Luna. There was no moon to see on the evening of the 6th due to storms and clouds, so this is a photo I captured the next evening from a window in our bedroom, the same window that overlooks the girls garden… For my 1st Mother’s Day after the girls died, Eric had 2 stars named for our sweet girls. They are in their zodiac sign- Virgo- and their ‘star cluster’ is called Twin Angel Bees. After we lost Baby A this past spring he had another star added to our cluster… we felt that since she was a twin too, it was fitting to put her into our cluster even if it wouldn’t have been her ‘sign’. We have this app called Sky Guide that we look at sometimes as we lay in bed looking out the skylight, or on clear nights when we find ourselves outside in the garden. We also check to see where Virgo is, and then try to figure out where Rylie, Avary and Baby A’s stars would be relative to a few bright stars we can actually see despite the city lights that dim the sky. We talk often about a trip we plan to take to Sedona one day- A trip that would be centered around having our very own Sky Guide who could help us locate and actually see our stars. This is a trip to an amazingly beautiful, quiet and serene place that we actually considered going to right after the girls died as a way of ‘getting away’…. at the time we decided against it- that our hearts just weren’t in the planning and excitement that would be needed to enjoy such a trip. I think that was the right choice. We talk about it often now, like it will be our pilgrimage trip to find our babies, and hopefully in turn find some peace within ourselves …. it would not be in the way most people get to see their children…. but we are not like most people anymore. And that’s okay. This is our journey, and ours alone. And hopefully one day we will have some amazing telescope-aided photos of our Twin Angel Bees cluster of stars to share ⭐️🐝⭐️🐝⭐️🐝

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